How to Improve Your Kid's Behavior

Setting An Example

From the moment they establish perception, and as they grow up, kids look to their parents and guardians for guidance on how to act and how to behave in different situations. It's how they learn and comprehend appropriate behavior in various settings, so it is important that you as a parent, set an exemplary standard of conduct. A young child's mind is impressionable and very sensitive to any early experience so it is paramount that you begin imparting wisdom from a very young age, and interacting with your child so they can begin to understand the spoken language and determine the meaning in facial expressions. You have to remember that you are a significant figure of influence. Therefore, a large determining factor in your child's behavior is your own and how you've reacted to situations in front of their eyes, so be understanding and patient with your kids, and realize that you have had a large impact on how they behave. There are, however, others factors at play which will be made apparent through the course of this article.

Consider The Implications Of Behavior

Some acting out in childhood is normal, and to be expected. Children are establishing their character through using their voice and their actions so some communications may not always appear to fit the norm, but this is simply a time of self-discovery and self-expression. As a parent, you should be encouraging this rather than stifling your child’s individuality. So where you can, and where your child's behavior doesn't risk their own or the welfare of others, allow this to unfold with words of advice here and there if you feel it is necessary. As kids reach their teenage years and adolescence, you can expect a rebellious phase of sorts. As pressures to fit in or to stand out mounts, so does the child's desire to show their ability to achieve either one, and this can materialize itself through, what you may refer to as, ‘bad behavior.’ ‘Bad behavior’ and falling in with “the wrong crowd,” can have more serious implications for the health of your child so it is important to be supportive and vigilant should this occur. If you are concerned about your child, consider booking them into a specialized drugs program or a rehab center in order to get them the help they need if they have struggled with frustration, mental health issues, a downward spiral into addiction and dependence and subsequent bad behavior. It's crucial that you remember that there is hope and help to be found in situations such as these.

Incentives

Incentives work to encourage your children to behave better, as they’re gaining from their good behavior. Consider rewarding any good behavior with praise and congratulations; you could do this by making a reward system, or by displaying a behavioral chart in your home. Allow your children to make the chart and display it a visible level in your kitchen, for example. Each time your child engages in good behavior, or achieves an accolade in school, then reward them with either a point on the chart or with a small gift prize such as an edible sweet treat or a small cash sum. You can ask your children which rewards they would prefer since you want to be optimizing their desire to win the incentives and further the likelihood of them improving their behavior. You want to promote good behavior, so by using the chart, you're allowing your child to keep note of their progress, and if you have other children, then you're also encouraging a healthy rivalry to achieve, and with any luck, you should be able to improve their behaviors respectively.

Explanation

Before you ask something of your child or want to tell them to stop misbehaving, you must explain how their actions are impacting on yourself or others. For example, if your child is misbehaving by being rude to others around you, it's important to take your child quietly aside and explain that their actions have consequences and their words can hurt others. By explaining why you're unhappy with their actions, children are better able to see your side and are far more likely to stop engaging in bad behavior this way than if you had raised your voice and told them to “stop.” By explaining why you'd like them to stop and why you believe they're misbehaving, either because they're tired of hungry, for example, you're allowing your child to understand causation and effect. Tell your child how you'd like them to behave in such situations and congratulate them when they succeed in achieving this. Explanation allows your child to get a grip on understanding what you expect of them, and what behaviors you will not tolerate, which ones will incur you telling them off, and which behavior results in them being praised and rewarded.

Don't Punish

You won't teach your children to be better behaved by enforcing punishment, instead, you're simply communicating that your children should fear you. Consider removing some privileges after repeated and calm warnings, like access to the games console or an earlier bedtime, if bad behavior persists, then remove the items but ensure that you clearly state how these privileges can be earned back. Try never to threaten your children with revocation of privileges without just cause, and you shouldn't use this as a means to control your children throughout the day. By all means, you can have a strike system, so that your child can keep track of how many strikes they are accumulating, but ensure that you stay true to the board. You don’t have to use gimmicks if you’d rather not. However, if you favor doing so, then tell your children that they’ve earned a strike for their bad behavior. If you've decided that a certain behavior warrants removing their games console for 24 hours, then it’s important that you do not stray from this regulation unless in extreme circumstances. Otherwise, your child will not be able to grasp the system leading to confusion and frustration fully, and in turn, there will be a higher likelihood of them misbehaving further.