Unprotected Sex and Old Girlfriends: A Rant

Yeah, that got your attention, didn't it? Let's dive right in.

So I watched a season of this reality show called "VanderPump Rules". Remember we are not here to discuss the merits of reality TV and whether or not I should be polluting my brain with it. Remember again (redundant?) that I do not have any awesome vices anymore since I'm losing weight, so reality TV is it. Try and focus, people.

So this show is a spin-off from "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills." There is a person on there named Lisa VanderPump who owns a restaurant called SUR. "VanderPump Rules" is a show about the staff there. Lisa is English so she says it "stoff."

I have two issues with this season (keep in mind I was also 20-something once and was also a big drama baby; now I am a full-fledged middle-aged drama queen):

1. This nasty dog Jax seems to go around having unprotected sex all over California and Nevada. Yeah, the obvious happened, and it seems like more than once: pregnancy and giving-her-some-money-to-take-care-of-it. My kind of guy. Oh, and the lying about it to his current girlfriend. Dude is a sociopath for sure; no tears even shed as he broke the news to his woman. As Andy Cohen of BRAVO would say, here's what:

-- I'm sure I will offend someone with this, but I hate how black men get the rap for being the ones who make babies all over creation with multiple women and when a white man does it and an abortion occurs, it's all good. He has "taken care of it."

-- I also hate how people like myself who CHOOSE to have many children because we LIKE them and can TAKE CARE OF THEM get snide remarks and looks. You want I should give one back?

2. This drama baby Kristin had a major meltdown over running into her boyfriend/shack-up lovah's EX-lovah (stay with me here) at a photo shoot. She freaked out, people, then went and let her man have it. For what? For HAVING SEX WITH SOMEONE BEFORE SHE CAME ALONG.

Here's what: this is the society we live in. I love how one of the Bachelors on TV allegedly saved himself for marriage. Rock on, dude. This is rare, and I applaud you.

But here's what, Kristin: I am a little too close for comfort with a couple of women my husband of 15 years was WITH before me, and you don't see me beating him up over it or acting like a diaper baby around the women. And I am Facebook pals with a couple of guys I used to date and my husband is not all checking my account with his mascara running down his face while wailing at me because I had a LIFE before him.

In conclusion: Sex is an intimate act. Don't do it with someone you don't want to spend the rest of your life with cuz stuff happens.

Garden of the Gods in Manitou/Colorado Springs

Originally posted 9/19/10 when we were on vacation in Colorado. I could use a vacation right now, so I'm reposting this!

Yeah, yeah, we went to church this Sunday before we went to what I like to call my Outdoor Church: Garden of the Gods. In fact, we went to TWO churches this morning, devout Catholics that we are. Actually, we made a mistake and went to an Episcopalian church first. We made it halfway through before Aron realized we weren't at a Full-On Catholic Mass (I was in the hallway with active girls and Sam, so I was clueless about the situation, which is of course a first). So he schlepped our butts to another church, where I spent the whole Mass in the nursery with my 2 youngest bonding with the nursery workers and playing with my kids.  I think God was cool with that.  I don't, however, think God's cool with traipsing all the little kids to another room to do a Sunday Schoolish youth program and have some fun instead of sitting through church ... and then telling them, "Oops, we have nobody to teach this. Go back and sit with your parents."

Anyway ... our Garden of the Gods experience was amazing as always. Got some walking in, some playing in the red dirt in, lots of time to think about the awesomeness of the universe (no, I was not smoking weed).

And it's always fun to put your kids in rock cracks and take pictures of them.

Call Me Crazy ...

... but I went down to the basement the other day (by the way, is there any other way but to go DOWN to a basement? isn't that a redundant statement I made?), and ...

I heard running wild banshees going crazy on the level above me.

They were running and laughing and having fun.

Some people would yell STOP IT. Believe me, I have my days when I can't handle the noise. I am no saint, friends.

But usually it just makes me smile. It's like music to my ears. It's all I ever wanted to hear when I was stuck in a cubicle working in my late 20s and dreaming of having kids and being at home with them all the time.

Lazy Crockpot Cinnamon Sugar Apples

This is so easy, makes a nice dessert and makes your house smell amazing!

Just cut up any type of apple you like into chunks and toss them into a slow cooker.

Then toss a stick of butter or margarine on top.

Sprinkle in maybe 1/2 cup of sugar.

Sprinkle in maybe 2 T of cinnamon.

Cook on low 4 hours.

Make this recipe your own ... more or less sugar, make it light, whatever.

Enjoy!

P.S. No, I don't peel the apples because I am lazy. AND my friend Jill gave me the idea to put in some flour so it isn't as runny, and also add oats to the top for a Cobbler Effect!

Messy Monday: Snowed in the Midwest

So we have another big snowstorm in progress here in Kansas City. I got some awesome Popeye arms shoveling snow last week, let me tell you! So now things are getting cancelled left and right. Scouts, gymnastics, religious education, you name it. We are gonna be snowed in. Yeah, we have food and all that stuff. My main concern is keeping everyone OCCUPIED, if you know what I mean.

The kids have plenty of toys and schoolwork and movies to watch and games and all that. So when they are happy and playing, I like to sneak off and ...

ORGANIZE.

Above is a picture that is very exciting to me. It's a box (one of like 3 FULL boxes) of kid artwork, postcards, letters and so on. I got them all organized recently into separate Banker's boxes for each kid. I have a sad reason for having done this. Since my friend's son died, I thought about how I would like easy access to any one of my kids' writings and artwork ... just in case.

Oh, and it'll be nice when they move out and you can say, "Here ya go. Here's your box of stuff. Enjoy it until it gets ruined in your future basement flood. Don't worry about me; I have everything scanned."

I also got stuff out of these boxes because it seems some mice or other creatures got into the boxes and ate some of the stuff with glue on it. And let me give you some advice, parents: don't save the crap made out of macaroni or rice. Mice love that crap and they don't realize they are also eating other important things you have saved.